Back from Hiatus

Okay gents, as usual, my life undertook some dramatic revamping in the span of a month.

1. I lost my last job after the company folded- but not before I dealt with the Old Skeez one last time. I worked one last fashion market in NYC and I made it clear to the old man that there was a bigger chance of me participating in a butch n' hairy muff diving session than us getting beyond basic handshakes.
2. I went into a complete panic mode- stopped eating basic meals- sustained myself on raw organic almonds and baby spinach leaves and lost 20 pounds in 3 weeks. some of us eat when we stress out, I regress to my former Nicole Richie eating habits. Completely unintentional. and so not appropo for a gay boy in love with biceps.
3. Was offered amazing job at Time Inc as an Associate Editor. Extreme joy. Thoughts of expansive benefits package and paid vacation filled my mind. Celebrated with a ketel one gimlet and a steak frites meal.
4. Realized inflexible start date meant that I had ONE WEEK to move to New York . Panic sets in. Return to nibbling on almonds.
5. Checked out approximiately 47 apartments in New York over a span of three days. Most looked like crime scenes from a CSI episode. Others consisted of lofted beds, with kitchens smaller than an office cubicle- which is fine but when the asking price is 1600- because its located in Manhattan- and not even cute Manhattan but a neighorhood like Kips Bay ---then you know you're fucked because you've returned to New York in the Springtime. The Gods laughed at me and I ate more almonds.
6. Found a decent apartment in Williamsburg but with three roommates- but it was honestly the only place I could find that was A) built and/or renovated in the past decade B) was close to a train and C) and wasn't inhabited by complete social wackos, odd hipsters, or fat people. (I'm sorry but we all have our prejudices, and I can't for the life of me live with anyone who could use a call to Jenny Craig.
7. Packed up my stuff in LA- and said goodbye to my LA friends who all cried and proclaimed me their best friend ever. They now have forgotten and replaced me with some other latin queen. Why? Because they're gay and live in LA. And you can't really miss anyone for too long while living in LA because there are many house parties to hit up.
8. I'm crazy because I honestly and genuinely miss LA. I miss my huge room and my car. I miss my garden and being able to see my family on the weekends if I fancied it. (which meant that I went once a month.... i'm lying, it was more like every 6 weeks, okay im lying again.....) and I miss my friends but I seem to meet incredible people whereever I go. Which either means I have really low-standards (slightly true) or I'm really lucky.

So here I am.
Back in New York with an amazing job. And a totally different take on New York. 9 to 6 in NYC? What the fuck?!

Here's to more steaks, Barney's Warehouse sales, taxi mishaps, and the return of the saucy latina to New York. I know that I have a lot more almonds in store for me but I gotta tell you, I'm really fucking excited about this job- and my new life in New York, post-LA, post-partying,and post-distressed denim.